#LifeUpdate 10 Things I’m Struggling With ft. ranting and I can’t make any decisions in 2018 apparently

So, I’m back into blogging…BUT FACING A LOT OF PROBLEMS!!

My life’s just a bit of a mess right now. I have so many things to do but don’t where to start. I have all the time in the world but don’t know how to prioritise my to-do-list. I want to write SO many posts but instead, I rant about HOW I AM INCABALE OF MANAGING MY OWN DAMN LIFE.

But remember how I said this blog will be more…me? Maybe that’s not quality content but I’m getting more and more used to that idea that this blog is for ME!? I don’t know why but that thought comforts me a lot. So I’m just going to let it all out.

Long-Divider1. HOW DO YOU WRITE POSTS AGAIN!?

It seems while I’ve been in this “slump” I’ve forgotten how to do…everything?! Like, i sit down to write a blog post but I just get distracted or just sigh and look at my screen and scream “WHY THE FRIG CAN’T THIS POST WRITE ITSELF?!” I was originally writing a very exciting post but then gave up, opened a new draft, and let the words flow. Which is what you are reading right now!

Long-Divider2. What do I focus on?

Do I focus on editing my novel, or reading and catching up on my Goodreads challenge or do I schedule a post or do I start homework?

See, I’m on a one-week break from school and I have a lot of free time on my hands. This is great! I KNOW. But the thing with a lot of time, WHAT DO YOU DO WITH IT!?!  I have a gazillion things to do and I just don’t know WHAT to prioritise. I’ve been dabbling in my novel for a bit, starting edits but I want my full attention on it. BUT NO! There’s reading and blogging nagging at me. So then I leave my WIP and go to read. But when I read I feel guilty for not doing homework! And then writing a blog post I think I should be doing something else!! I want to focus on ONE thing but everything else is calling for my attention. And whenever I’m on Twitter or relaxing with my family I know that IM WASTING TIME AND I SHOULD BE DOING SOMETHING.

Frustration.

Long-Divider3. What do I read?

Oh gosh I’m getting more indecisive by the day guys but I have so many physical copies to read and I’m slowly catching up and I want to read so many but I can’t and??? Like?? WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME?! I run Twitter polls but don’t like the results so end up ignoring them!? WOHOOO

I also have promised to read way too many books and hinted at way too many buddy reads that I actually can’t fulfil and I just feel like I’m drowning. I’m stuck between the hype and books I actually want to read

Long-Divider4. I don’t think critically enough?

I feel like I’m rating every book 4 or 5 stars and I’m not being critical ENOUGH. I hate that? One of the one hand, i want to be more picky about books but then I feel like I’m judging them too harshly and maybe I’m just genuinely reading good books? I THINK YOU CAN SEE MY PROBLEM HERE.

book #2.JPG

Long-Divider5. Is my content any good?

I FEEL LIKE NO ONE ENJOYS MY CONTENT anymore AND IM SCREAMING INTO A VOID. And No I don’t want to take a break because I’ve already taken one. I’ve already got inspiration and motivation I JUST HAVE A LOT OF SELF-DOUBT OKAY and I feel like people only still read my content because they want to be “loyal” readers and not because they actually enjoy what I write? I also feel like I try really hard to be part of this community but I still feel like I’m the awkward one and the odd-one-out?

Long-Divider6. I know I’m going to need beta-readers in the future but THE THOUGHT SCARES ME.

It really does! i just have this feeling that my mutuals will hate my book and be like “oh yeah that was okay” and?? That’s why I’m so terrified to share this with people because I have this thought that I know they will hate it because it’s stupid and underdeveloped and don’t make sense and my writing is bland and boring and everyone will hate my book.

Long-Divider7. I am actually running out of bookshelf space

I NEVER thought I’d run into this problem and I have been dutifully re-organising my bookshelf every time I receive a new book but it’s starting to lose it’s magic because of the fact my bookshelf ISN’T the tardis so like?? Yeah.

Long-Divider8. TWITTER IS TOO DISTRACTING + lack of tweets

I only tweet good stuff every two weeks? I feel stupid for that. I NEED TO POST MORE TWEETS LIKE I USED TO. But nope I’m a just a lump. And I spend way too much time on TWITTER SOMEONE STOP ME.

Long-Divider9. I put off 400+ pages books because of my reading challenge

If I read some of my anticipated releases ever like Children of Blood and Bone or The Astonishing Colour of After, I will take more than 2 days to finish and then I’ll slip MORE BEHIND IN MY GR CHALLENGE?! And I’m already 2 books behind but I WANT to read these books but have this irrational fear that they will put me in a slump. BASICALLY, HUGE BOOKS TERRIFY ME.

Long-Divider10.  Am I wasting my time?

School’s nearly starting, enjoy your break! But do your work as well! AND MAKE SURE YOU DO ALL THE GAZILLION THINGS ON YOUR TO-DO LIST otherwise your not making use of your free time!!

I just feel like I’m drowning and I have so much time to do everything instead I just sit around complaining about how much I have to do WHEN I SHOULD BE ACTUALLY DOING THE STUFF. I feel a bit like a blob right now, being a bit useless and moping around. I feel like stuff happens in my life and I’m just like “eh” and I feel so disconnected. I feel so unbothered to text or message anyone even blogging friends IM SORRY. I read messages! And don’t reply to them!

Long-Divider

book.JPG

Let's Whisper

NO ACTUALLY LET’S SCREAM. What are you struggling with in your life? Want to just rant about anything and everything? Go ahead! Do you relate to any of this? Do you have any advice for the penguin here?

Ilsa - Edited

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43 thoughts on “#LifeUpdate 10 Things I’m Struggling With ft. ranting and I can’t make any decisions in 2018 apparently”

  1. Oh, you sound so overwhelmed! I’m so sorry. I think a lot of bloggers feel the same way you do. I know that I struggle to balance writing/blogging/reading and just everyday life. I wish I had some amazing advice to give you. All I can say is welcome back, I enjoy your posts, and I hope that things get better for you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. In general it seems like you need a confidence boost. You are awesome. Who cares what other people think? Write what you want to write, read what you want to read, do what you want to do. Stop feeling the guilt. Be who you are. Be true to yourself! Don’t worry about what you “should” be doing or what people will think. Ya know?

    And I’d love to beta read your book when it’s ready. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hey!! I’ve been following you for a very short time but I love your content so much!!! You have so many amazing ideas 😀

    Also I feel you about “WHAT TO READ”. I felt the same last year, I just didn’t know how to choose anymore ugh.

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  4. Aww ❤ Write the posts to yourself. They say about writing a book that if you are not excited about it, nobody else will be either. I think it's the same for blog posts.

    As for shelf space: i was fine with mine! I have not bought a physical copy for 2 years… until now. Suddenly: everything is bookshelf. Yes, even the floor 😀

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  5. First: Take a deep breath.
    The good news is that you’ve already taken a step–writing about your stress. Telling other people. Don’t let it all build up.

    Second: We do enjoy your content, but we enjoy it for YOU. It’s easy to second-guess yourself and fill your head with doubt, but trust me. Be yourself, write what comes naturally to you, and DON’T COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS. If you’re struggling and forcing yourself to write something, just don’t. Write what you want, and be genuine. That’s what people want to read. (or at least, what I want to read. I see so many book bloggers forcing things and everything just coming across as a facade.)

    Third: Put your mental health first. This might require some sacrifices. Take a look at the things on this list, the things that you are feeling overwhelmed by, and ask yourself if it’s really worth being overwhelmed by it. So what if you haven’t been tweeting as much? Why do you set yourself to that standard if it’s not working out for you? I know it feels like you have to live up to expectations for your readers, but it’s not like that. You set your own boundaries, not us. I know it’s intimidating when you see people on GR with 200+ book goals, but again: don’t compare yourself to others. Do what works for you. A few years ago, I set my goal to 15 books because I had been struggling so much with reading, and I ended up doubling it and read 30. And even though some people read that many books in a month, it meant everything to me.

    And you know what? If you’ve achieved your goal and are happy about it, people will celebrate with you! It doesn’t matter how big or small—people like to see other people succeed, and YOU define what success looks like for you.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I get like this all the time, you’re not alone. It really helps me to have a plan, so that you can focus without worrying about all the other stuff you have to do. Google action planning, I use the technique a lot and I find it really useful. And don’t forget to allow yourself some breaks and down time.

    Secondly, stop being so hard on yourself! I don’t tweet AT ALL and literally nothing happens. I’m a book blogger, not my own PR agency.

    Finally, when all else fails, work out what makes you happy and concentrate on that. If you need to take another break, take another break – we’ll all still be here when you get back.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I’ll beta your book and I will try to not make you cry (just kidding, I’m a nice person). But SERIOUSLY have I ever hated anything you wrote? NOPE.
    Anyway, your content is amazing as always! NO NEED TO WORRY

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  8. WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE LOVE. Take a deep breath and let me just quote that ” I feel like people only still read my content because they want to be “loyal” readers and not because they actually enjoy what I write?” and JUST WRITE IN ALL CAPS. I know what it’s like to feel self-doubt and to have ALL of these feelings, they go through my mind about 2946564 times a week, too. But let me tell you: I and tons of people commenting here and visiting your blog and reading your content, do it because they love you and your blog and everything you put out there, really. You have a unique blog and a unique way of writing your blog posts and of spreading your love for books in reviews, screaming in all caps and writing ranty posts, too. You’re YOU and you’re making this blog the most YOU it can be and I am here for that because you are awesome and your personality shines in every single thing you write and I love that. ❤
    I so understand feeling overwhelmed by everything, reading, blogging, tryin to write your WIP, not knowing what to do, what to prioritize, when to write and everything else. It's hard, but you should take a deep breath and focus on what you WANT to do at the time. If you don't feel like tweetin for two weeks straight, IT IS OKAY. If you can't write a blo post because you are not inspired that's okay too. You're doing great. Take things slow, one day at a time, and remember to think about yourself first and what you want to do, not what you think is expected of you, with blogging, reading books, tweeting all the time etc. Easier said than done, but that's what will make you happier for sure, I know thinking that way helps me little by little everyday, too. ❤
    Sending you ALL the love ❤ ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Definitely take a deep breath and a step away from everything. You deserve to give yourself that break and try not to feel guilty about it ☺️ it’s difficult when you feel overwhelmed with all of these things to try and focus on and wish there was some way that I could help you out! What I can say, which is truthful, is that I love your content and I feel like the odd one out too – so at least we’re in that together. Big hugs and love sending your way ❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Isla, I love your content! You have a distinct, amazing voice, and I don’t know if I’ve ever come across one of your posts that I haven’t enjoyed! You’re a wonderful person, and a wonderful writer, and that makes your posts great.

    I think that everyone feels like the awkward one, or the odd one out sometimes. Or even more than sometimes. I certainly do. I chose to comment on this specific part of your post because it really resonated with me. You perfectly described the way I feel, and it actually really helped to know that someone else out there feels the same way I do.
    You aren’t alone, everyone feels this way. But it also doesn’t mean anything. You are amazing and your blog is amazing.
    So keep on being amazing!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. hey don’t feel guilty about not wanting to message your blogging friends or friends or people in general!! I’m like that a lot, and you shouldn’t feel bad about not being in the mood to talk. leaving people on read is completely fine because if you don’t want to / are not actually ABLE to talk, you don’t have to.

    and aaahhh I so face the “am I reading critically thing??” all the time. I mean, nowadays, I’ve been really critical and I love it, but then I always end up comparing this x-rated book, with the same x-rated book and wondering if they’re really on the same level or if I should rate one book y or z or whatever. don’t feel bad about however you rate your books, tho!!! you’re going to doubt yourself, because that’s something human. if you don’t feel like you’re reading critically enough, leave a rating off until you write your review & are able to gather your thoughts!! then you can assess how you really felt about the book. (maybe?)

    also!! you are FINE if you are running behind on your GR challenge. that kind of pressure is really healthy for me usually (unless I end up losing a whole lot of sleep to catch up, which is not ideal) but if it isn’t healthy for you, lower it!! you can ALWAYS get it higher once you get into the reading rhythm again. and god don’t worry about ignoring the big books (ALTHO I WOULD 1000000% DROP EVERYTHING TO READ COBAB & ASTONISHING BUT THAT’S JUST ME). I do it all the time too, especially because my experience with big books have ended up with me slumping

    I know that other people talked about this but I wanna say again that don’t force yourself to Tweet!! don’t force yourself to do anything!!! and if you WANT do to it but don’t, don’t beat yourself up!!! only use that as motivation to do it in the future!!!! (this is me referencing to how I want to actually do my HW on Saturdays but never end up doing it and then end up hating myself but only trying harder the next weekend to actually do my HW)

    and I know one person may not be enough, but I can confidently say that I don’t read your posts just to support you as a friend, but because I really do love them and I really look forward to your posts and I really do love everything about your blog. and I also love you!!! yes, we read because of you, because we love you and want to support you, but we enjoy your posts so much.

    hey hey hey don’t worry about beta-readers. (I’m assuming I’d be one???? this will be very awkward if this isn’t true) if you want them, but are anxious about how they feel, JUST WAIT!!! just explain to them if/when you enlist them about how nervous you are and I’m sure they’ll understand!! and sweetie, they will probably love the book. (or at least like it. BUT NOT HATE IT!!) and if they DO hate it, just take a deep breath, cry if you want to or it helps you, and then take their feedback and make it BETTER so they’ll like it better!!! I know it’s an absolutely devastating feeling to hear that friends don’t like your writing, and I know it’s really not the best advice — but everyone has different opinions. you can’t control what they do or don’t like. but what you can control is how you react to it and how you get back up and how you go on from there. and they will not tell you that they hate it like “oh my god… I hate it” or “that was… okay”. they will probably be like “okay so like,,, I didn’t love it BUT I THINK YOU’RE AN AMAZING WRITER!!! and you have such a creative imagination!!” it’ll soften the blow, not take it away completely, but HEY! this is life!! I know that sounds so horribly unsympathetic but you’ve already been through so many things in life. you’re strong and you’ll get through it again and again and again.

    (also, I PROMISE you that a lot of things are in your head!!! I was in a bad place in January — bad meaning just feeling really really dead and thinking “what’s the point of everything”, so not extremely HORRIBLE, but definitely not the best mindset — but this month, I’m working hard to be proactive and trying to find that point. not saying that you aren’t!!! because it was so so hard to get out of that place and I’m still struggling now!!! (like, a lot) but that attitude was all in my head. it took me so much effort to WANT to do certain things but I’m finally getting better. AND a lot of doubts are all in our head. I can’t say this enough. IT’S IN OUR HEAD. but I KNOW that recognizing that it’s in our heads may not help anything. I’m gonna use the example of me realizing that I think that I’m not pretty or beautiful or whatever (this is me trying to be flippant about this when it is not a flippant matter) because I’m not white. I recognize those thoughts. I know they’re not good. I know they’re not true. but just like with doubts, recognizing them as things that aren’t true — which… I hope you’ve realized because they most DEFINITELY are not true and in your head??? — doesn’t mean they’ll go away. wow so idk the purpose of this rant but I just want to say — recognize your doubts are in your head!! recognize that a lot of them (most of them) aren’t true!! but if you still continue to have those doubts, DON’T. FEEL. BAD. because recognizing them does not mean they will go away. also I have other things to say but this is really taking a toll on me so I’m going to stop now)

    oh and one last tip (before I end this horribly long ranty comment that you are under no obligation to reply to): TRY SOMETHING NEW!!! I read two ebooks this month and while it doesn’t seem like a lot, I feel so much more refreshed after that?? I never usually read ebooks and wasn’t really for them, but now it’s made me more excited to read and that’s cool!!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I know how you feel. :/ I’m not in school anymore and I don’t have a job yet so I don’t really know what to do with my life. I have just working on reading and blogging, but I feel like I’m not doing enough and I’ve been getting kinda depressed because I have no structure in my life. 😦
    But I LIKE reading your posts! I don’t think you should give up! I don’t really think I’m a very good blogger because I don’t post very original content and I don’t have as many resources as I would like and I struggle with being consistent and I have zero idea how to use social media, but I’ve only had my blog for a year and I’m trying to figure it out still. So you’re not alone in feeling like you’re not doing enough. :/

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  13. Hey, your blog is AMAZING and I definitely enjoy your content! As a writer, you’ll always be thinking critically about your writing but remember that important part is everything you’ve learned and gained from it. Ultimately, do what you feel is best and CHILLAX (as hard as that may be)! GO PENGUINS!

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  14. Life happens and I completely understand where you are coming from. I’ve been feeling a bit of blogger doubt meself lately. Like I think all my content is crap and my reviews are crap and everything is just crap. lol. I’d recommend to not push yourself. Let things happen when they happen. Try not to worry about getting your posts on time or your tweets. Those that love and support you will complete understand. Those that don’t? Well, their loss.

    And please know that whenever you need a friend, my DMs are always open. I work overnights so I am up all night. Don’t hesitate to slip right in. ❤

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  15. hey, i can completely relate to your rant about the overwhelming feeling of wanting to do eVERYTHING and not being able to do so. i think the most important hing is to take a deep breath and BE WHERE YOU ARE AND BE PRESENT. like, if you’re blogging, just blog, forget about the homework and the books, etc for that short time period, and be in the moment. then when you’re reading a book, even if it’s for a short time period, just accept that you’re going to be reading in the next few minutes and not think about anything else that you need to do. you can write down a list if it helps clear your mind, too. I’ve found these tips help me ALOT, and i Hope they help you too. xx

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  16. EVERYONE feels like this sometimes, it is completely normal. I am being so unproductive and have so much schoolwork to do and I am just neglecting it and doing useless things instead. What I like to do when things get unmanagable is to think about everything you like doing and are good at and then do something related to them which kind of takes your mind of all your struggles and problems.

    I honestly wish I had your humour because I think everyone needs a bit of your humour. PLEASE DON’T STOP POSTING!

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  17. Aw, no, Ilsa! I’m here for your content as much as my love for you. I felt this way too. I dealt with it by quitting my previous blog and starting a new one with the kind of content I wanted to make (from a writing/personal blog to a book blog). You can try that out if you think your voice and content need to undergo a change (you needn’t change the entire blog, but can maybe talk about in a post so your followers are notified). Or you can just continue to do what you want to do because, as you pointed out, this blog is for YOU.
    The guilt has reached a new level for me. I don’t have the time to interact with people from this community. I started a Bookstagram and I’m already a failure two months in. I can’t seem to get anything done. Even reading has taken a backseat for me. I just try to do my best with the time I have. I know I’m not doing it, but you do reach a point where you stop being confused and just do your best and hope it’s enough. I hope you power through this phase and get to where I am, Ilsa. Sending loads of love, luck and patience your way! ❤❤❤

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  18. do you feel that??? I’M SENDING YOU LOADS OF VIRTUAL HUGS RN BECAUSE YOU DESERVE THEM AND ALSO ALL THE LOVE IN THE WORLD ❤ ❤

    1) don't feel like you have an obligation to blog!!!! like you said, your blog is supposed to be for YOU. so you should just write what you feel like writing!! (like this post) me and loadsss of other people love you for it and will keep reading and commenting on your posts – because we admire *you*!!!!
    2) don't feel pressurized to tweet!!!! don't force yourself to do it!! don't force yourself to do anything you don't want to!!! because you are a precious penguin and you must take your own wants into consideration or you'll make yourself sad and that is sad and you shouldn't be sad
    3) you have great content!!! and continue to provide great content!!! don't be worried about not posting good stuff, because trust me, you are. all your posts are really interesting + well-written, and i'm not just saying this as a friend of yours but as someone who has looked up to you for the longest time!!!!
    4) if u ever want to rant feel free to hit me up or one of your other friends because we have a steady stream of support just for you ❤ ❤

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  19. I AM WITH YOU. I often struggle with organizing my free time and feeling stressed out when I think I am wasting it. It’s annoying because I want to just relax and take a break but my brain won’t let me.
    Ooh, your number 3 point makes me think of a really neat post by Shar @ Virtually Read about the problems of getting caught up in reading hyped books and not taking the time to read the books you really want! If you haven’t read it you should check it out because it is amazing.
    I am a blob too right now. Personally I am having a crazy school month and things are only about to get worse. Every time I have a free moment I start to stress about what I COULD be accomplishing. But sometimes I don’t WANT to schedule every second of my life? Even though I know I would technically become more efficient if I did so? Sometimes wasting time is what keeps me sane.
    Hang in there, my bloggerly comrade!

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  20. I struggle with these things too and I believe pretty much every true blogger does at some point in their journey. Stay strong, push through it and find who you are and where you belong in the blogosphere. Spend time thinking about it, write about how you’re feeling, ask for help. We’re all here for you!

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  21. Life’s just such a big, massive crap hole sometimes, right? It’s like it just wants you to fail?!!?! And DON’T EVEN GET ME STARTED on school pressures, they don’t seem to comprehend that we actually have LIVES and we’re not just robots, incapable of emotions!

    As hard as it is, and trust me when I say I am the #QUEEN of slumps 😂, it’s so natural for everything to just pile up once in a while, and try not to let it get you down too much xx

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  22. Don’t worry too much about your blog quality and the content you put out! Your followers (including me) will always love your posts ❤ Hope you get to read and write more during your break! And I have had days when I just don't know what to write on my posts… just wait for a while and that moment will pass.

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  23. OMG this post is me right now. I feel like I can’t decide what books I’m in the mood for anymore and every time I sit down to read and “destress” my brain is still running a thousand times a minute telling me I should be starting HW or writing a blog post. I’m also overwhelmed with whether or not to read the books I got approved for on Net Galley and if I should be reading those first or be reading the books I actually want to be reading!! Im so frustrated with myself because its so not like me to be this indecisive but I can’t help it! Theres just too much going on and I never feel like I have the time to do it!

    Please though take a moment to really think about what makes you happy (and I mean truly happy) and whatever it is continue to do more of that. I do hope you keep blogging because I truly LOVE your content and look foreword to your reviews both on your blog and Good Reads!! (but everyone needs breaks too!) Your posts are great! (this one for example I LOVE)
    Take care of yourself and happy reading 🙂

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  24. AW BAB DO NOT WORRY. I RELATE TO THIS POST SO MUCH AND IT’S OKAY. I’m so glad that you feel that this blog is more of a place for YOU and not for others and that you now have an outlet/place to rant!!

    ALSO. Don’t write what you don’t feel like writing, DON’T FORCE YOURSELF to write posts that aren’t interesting to YOU and just write what COMES TO YOU. If you don’t feel like writing about that topic, DON’T. If you’re writing a post that you’re not really FEELING, it wont be how you want it to be because YOU DONT LOVE IT.

    I also totally understand the guilt about prioritising!! I feel like I just not using my time effectively, so I totally understand this!! But remember, that it’s okay for you TO HAVE A BREAK and RELAX and don’t try to overload yourself with work!!! You feel like you need to do one thing, and then you do it, and you feel good for a second because you got it done!! but then it’s like,,, you realise allllll the other things that you have to do and feel bad!! BUT remember, you’re not a machine and you can’t be doing everything all the time and that there’s gonna be a pace that works FOR YOU and

    OMG I LOVE YOUR CONTENT OKAY??? Personally, I’m getting really busy/really lethargic and just not on WP as much as I WANT to be, but I PROMISE YOU, I LOVE YOUR CONTENT, AND I LOVE YOUR CONTENT AND I LOVE YOU. (AND BETA READERS- I’M HERE!! DON’T BE SCARED MY BAB)

    And you have no obligation to respond to messages and talk to people! It’s okay!! We understand that you’re going through a “meh” time and there’s no pressure ❤ ❤

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  25. So much of this sounds just like me. I struggle so much with having so many things to do that I can’t decide which to work on and then not being able to focus on whatever I pick because I feel like I should be doing something else. And yeah, sometimes I wonder if my blog is any good and if anyone reads it or if it’s just a waste of time.
    Basically, I too am a blob of anxieties and doubts.
    But I’m sending you hugs and I hope you know that you’re a lovely person with a lovely blog.
    I think you put way too much pressure on yourself to reach your reading goals or respond to messages. But it’s ok. You really don’t have to do so much.
    Just don’t forget to breathe. I forget a lot when I get stressed, but it’s important. I know that sounds silly and obvious, but it’s true.
    *hugs* ❤

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  26. I relate to so many on these lists, especially the one about not knowing how to write posts anymore. I think it’s a thing that comes with being on a hiatus and losing that ability to write blog posts, I’m currently struggling even with blog posts ideas even though I used to have lots of them before. In your case, it sounds like you have many things to do and it can be difficult to handle everything, be kind to yourself and know that everyone has doubts from time to time, it’s totally normal. I wish you good luck with your book and don’t let yourself be intimidated by the possibility of criticism, not everyone will love your book, but you’re writing it for yourself and for the people who will (and surely these people will exist!). ❤

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  27. I feel this SO MUCH. I had a bad slump and coming back was just. Ugh. So ugh. All the ugh.

    I love that you’re making your blog about you, though, because that’s what’s important!

    And omg on not being critical enough, that’s my whole life.

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  28. how is this so relatable omg

    okay, soooo FIRSTLY- ILSA I WILL BE A BETA READER / CP / whichever’s earliest 😉 AND ILY MY SMOL BEAN AND ALL MY CRITICISM WILL BE CONSTRUCTIVE (if there even is any ha) AND IF PEOPLE ARE TOO ROOD I AM WILLING TO FIGHT THEM FOR YOU

    It’s so hard to balance blogging life and just like,,, normal life I AGREE but ummm maybe retweet some of your funny old tweets if you can’t find content lmao

    ALSO YOUR CONTENT IS 100% AND FANTASICCC

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  29. i love that you’re doing the blog for yourself and just letting your emotions out there, no matter how confusing they might be ♥

    i wrote my first post in like 2 weeks over this entire past week and i just stayed up all night today to finish writing it and i just posted it. i’ve been really busy with life. it’s understandable that bloggers have lives besides their blog

    you don’t have to review every book critically. maybe you liked the book and that’s why you rated it 4 or 5. it causes me stress to try to inspect every little detail about a book that i loved reading when i didn’t find much problems with it.

    your content is super good!!! i love that you’re truthful and REALISTIC!! you are very reflective and that’s always fantastic in a blogger because then we’re trying to figure out how to best balance everything and make sure to do our best in each thing aspect of our lives that we give time to.

    i would love to beta-read anything that you have written. i’m guessing you’re an AMAZE-BALLS writer and I can not wait to get my hands on something that you’ve written ♥♥♥ It’s totally normal to deal with self doubt in your writing sometimes, but you just have to take that leap and do it because you can get really good feedback.

    my own rant:

    i just got a job now and it’s exciting but also there’s a cute guy whom i can not for the life of me stop thinking about even though i’m trying to get over it, i have a paper due in several hours that i haven’t edited yet, i have classes that i feel like i’m lacking in, school is just annoying nowadays, i feel very bad mentally wise and i just started crying today until i fell asleep, and i just started reading and blogging again tonight.

    as of now, i feel better, but i think that it’s just a life thing. we’ll all have ups and downs and that moment when the roller coaster has a technical difficulty and we start questioning if we’ll be able to survive the moment. i’ve dealt with so many hard things in my life before and as i grow older, i’ll probably deal with bigger and harder things, but i think it’s my outlook in life that matters most, honestly. i just need to decide how i’ll react in every situation and not be so hard on myself.

    my advice for you:

    taking deep breathes works for me. i just try to slow down and cry it out. afterwards, i just lie in my bed and close my eyes and think about what i want to achieve and what scares me and what i can do about it. praying works as well, for me personally because i put my trust in God and it makes things easier in a way. i rearrange my thoughts so that i stop blaming myself for the stress and just start thinking about the reasons why i do the things that i do. sometimes, i get a notebook and write down everything that i need to do like school-work, my job, my chores, my blog, etc. then, I find write down the times that i can do those things and I just try to keep my head up and mental health in good shape. sooner or later, i feel lots better ♥

    I hope you feel better ♥

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  30. AHHHH! I don’t even know where to start – this post is too real! Let me just preface this with:
    This is the first time I am reading your blog and this is the very first post I chose to read
    AND I LOVE IT. I love your amazing ramble writing style because it is SO MUCH like mine and I can RELATE! You know?! So just straight out the gate, you can nix that fear of your content not being enough for your readers, because as a third party newby who just happened to stumble across your blog through a series of comment threads and creeping skills, I find it AWESOME.

    I know the feeling of having too much time on your hands. It is the sneakiest curse that I ever did see! You think all “A week off school? I’m going to be the most productive nugget around and finish my WIP and read all of the books and write a zillion reviews and bake a cake”. And then you sit there watching the clock tick away, having absolutely no clue where to start. You blink and BLAM – your time is gone. What I’ve been doing lately is creating some seriously nerdy hourly planners. It’s actually worked wonders! Competing priority stress be gone! 2 hours for writing, 1 hour for reading, 1 hour for tea with mom, 15 minutes for snacks, 1 hour for blogging, 8 hours for cuddling my kitty Tubs, and bed. then repeat. It’s foolproof!

    I average a 4/5 on all of my reviews and I, too feel like that’s too damn high! I honestly am pretty easy to please! Does that make me a potato of a reviewer?! I don’t even know. I’m just an easily entertained bean. That ain’t no crime!

    Best of luck with your WIP and all of your goals for this week off! You will do just great – just keep swimming, Dory!

    Liked by 1 person

  31. AWWW Ilsa all bloggers, readers and aspiring writers feel the way you do at one point or another. Honestly I can give you one piece of advice that I KNOW is right… read what YOU want even if it’s a 400 page book about apes… really if you aren’t enjoying your reading… if it feels too much like a job then you’ll want to quit. I can also say that I enjoy what you post! I’ve always felt like you include who you are in your post. We aren’t characters! We aren’t flat on a page. So yeah sometimes well show one part of ourselves and sometimes another. ♥️

    Liked by 1 person

  32. Read the big books and then counter it with a novella/graphic novel for your reading challenge. That might help you ease of that pressing feeling of your challenge. 🙂

    Sometimes writing blog posts just comes hard. It helps for me to have written down notes in advance, before I start. It keeps me more likely to finish or make it easier to come back to the post later. But sometimes we also just need to write random posts with whatever is on our minds or to fill in some tags that don’t require as much brain space (though tag questionsare getting harder and harder I’ll say, picking one favorite book my ass).

    Liked by 1 person

  33. Oh myyyyyyy goshhhhh I SO relate to feeling like you’re not thinking critically enough about book reviews!!!! I have this habit of only wanting to review books I think were good, but I realize that makes me look way too soft and not really sound on literary analysis (WHICH I AM, I JUST DON’T DO IT OUTSIDE OF AP LITERATURE). *Le sighhhhhh.*

    I also heavily relate to feeling overwhelmed by your to-do list/so disconnected and out of it that you could care less about it. #TheStruggleisDEFINITELYREAL.

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  34. My current WIP is being read by beta readers & I’m terrified, eek! It’s so SCARY. But maybe good? Because I really want the story to be the best thing possible, so I’m looking forward to knowing how I can improve, you know?
    Also, I’m so sorry that everything is stressing you out! Keeping up with the GR challenge can be overwhelming. I’ve learned just to read and not worry about the numbers. Because the challenge is for you & you can do whatever you want with it.

    Liked by 1 person

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